for those who don't want to just wait it out

like the song says this is a blog for someone who wants to say something (anything) and who's happy to wait and see what time will bring...

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

For when the roses bloom

There's something about music that will always inspire us and move us. There were two songs in particular that stood out to me the other night at Boy from Oz - so here are some reflections on them, that'll come out over the next couple of posts.

The first one was a duet between the characters of Liza Minelli and Peter Allen, titled "I'd rather leave while I'm in Love". To set the scene, they've been married for a little while, Judy Garland (her mother and the woman that brought them together in the first place) has recently died and they are both realising that Peter Allen in more attracted to someone else (a man) than he is to her. Some of the bittersweet words are:

"I'd rather leave while I'm in love
while I still believe in the meaning of the word.
I keep my dreams and just pretend,
that you and I were never meant to end.

To many times I've seen the rose die on the vine
Somebody's heart gets broken
Usually it's mine.
I don't want to take the chance
of being hurt again -
and you and I, can't say goodbye.

So if you wake and find me gone,
Just carry on - you see I need my fantasies.
I still believe, it's best to leave while I'm in love..."

The woman sitting next to me was sobbing throughout this song. I wanted to go and find a tissue for her and comfort this stranger, because I think I know where she was coming from. It's the story of too many of us isn't it? That unbelievable, excruciating pain of a heart that has been broken - and you can't ever imagine coming through to the other side of it.

But then the walls of defensiveness come up: "Somebody's heart gets broken, usually it's mine. I don't want to take the chance of being hurt again. I still believe, it's best to leave while I'm in love".

Why? Because I don't want to be the one left...? Because I don't think I could go through it again...? Because it's easier that way...?

But look again at the song and see the words of hope that are there: "while I still believe in the meaning of the word". It was a long time ago that my little heart was broken - and I still want to believe in the meaning of the word too! Don't you?

And I don't by any means want it to sound trite, but I want raise the question of how do I process these thoughts as a Christian? I ask the question because I know that God doesn't want us to be satisfied with crumbs - nor will He be satisfied with us trying to run away and hide from an emotion that He has created. For me the answer simply comes by trusting in the fact that Jesus knows more than I ever will what it means to have a heart that has been broken because the ones He loves have rejected Him. What is it for you?

1 Comments:

  • At 10:04 am, Anonymous chelsea said…

    Jodi, I could say so much in response to this post, you have no idea, but i wont bore you all...
    I did love that song in the show too though! And it made me think about similar stuff to what you have posted.
    I actually wrote a post a little while ago about the way looking at love and broken relationships in this world is a mere reflection of what God is and has been through!

    So all I say right now is Amen sister. I totally agree with you and empathise with you.

    And I like the hope you pointed out there. I remember thinking during the song how sad it was, and how crazy it seems (or at least how hard it must be) to leave someone you still love...but you're so right, there is hope in that, in believing in love and knowing it could happen again,...and, i guess, letting it...

    I will add two quotes from two of my fave Ryan Adams songs which remind me of all this (and which I also happened to be listening to as i read and write here):

    "Cos if I dont believe in love, then I dont believe in you, and I do"

    "And I hold you close in the back of my mind; feels so good but damn it makes me hurt. And I'm too scared to know how I feel about you now, how I feel about you now"

     

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